... Personal Development?

-I am offering my thoughts and knowledge about personal development and why it sometimes is hard to change.-

"Human behaviour is made up by habits and patterns, and personal development is about becoming aware of those habits and patterns and change the ones that no longer serves us."

When we talk about personal development, we often look for something that works instant, a quick-fix, one singel event or workshop and then we expect everything to be better.

In my experience, this approach rarely works and even more rarely are they long lastning.

They may help some people discover one or two things about themselves but without e.g. proper follow-up, coaching and being held accountable, behaviours are generally not that easy to change or break.

The reason for this is that we humans are creatures of habit and as strange as it sounds, we rather continue an unhealthy behaviour that no longer serves us, than break or change it. And the reason we do that is because we have an unconscious need to predict the outcome of our behaviour, behaviour of the people in our surroundings and the circumstances in which we are.

In TA we talk about Script. This is the narrative that we tell our selves at a very young age about whether our environment is a safe or unsafe place and what role we play in it.

If I believe that the world is an unsafe place, I think we can agree that my behaviour will be different than if I believe that the world is a safe place. In an unsafe world I might experience people as a threat, opportunities as risks of failure and my own and others abilities as limited. It's every person for themselves.

In a world where I feel safe I might develop other skills and traits that will support me in growing such as healthy trust in others, opportunities as a possible place for growing and my own and others abilities as flexible.

One challenge I see, could be the willingness to see what role we have in our own play (life); our Narrativ. We create it in real time but our abilities of what we create is dependent on what we believe. If we can get control over what we believe there is literally no limit to what we can become.